Yesterday I had my second acupuncture treatment. Before starting the session my acupuncturist wanted to check my balance. Naturally I thought I’d need to stand up, but no, she lit a little stick until it was hot and then held it to my fingers, one at a time, and I told her when I could feel the heat. My left thumb was out of balance with everything else (I am sure there is better explanation but I am not sure what it all means).

My left should had again started hurting- from carrying Mr. E, and she said these things were probably related, so in addition to treating my spring organs (organs are aligned with seasons and I guess it’s helpful to work with the seasons…I am taking it all on faith) we decided to also treat my shoulders.

I love the feeling of the needles going in, and then the tingling sensation as they work their magic. I love laying on the table, relaxing, watching the trees sway just beyond the window. I lie there, very aware that it is one of very few moments of indulgence I’ve experience in a very long time; I lie there, very aware that I do not have to do anything for anyone in that moment; for one hour every three weeks, it is all about me.

When it’s over my acupuncturist checks my pulses (she also does this before we start) and they have always changed and are in sync with each other, which is a sign that the needles are working. I leave there feeling light and airy. Maybe it’s because I’ve just spent time doing something for myself. Or maybe the acupuncture is doing something to me. Or probably it’s a little of both.

Deciding to do long distance inseminations has been difficult and naturally makes me second guess our move. Although one afternoon of seeing how excited Mr. E is to see his cousins, and they him, and I know we made the right choice. Sometimes the right choice isn’t easy though. And as we’ve decided our plan of action, I’ve longed for our old town, and all that was familiar and supportive (and dare I say easy?) of our ttc journey. Yesterday I spent the morning with several of my new friends here- talking while our children played near by. And then I went to acupuncture (which is also done by a friend with in my mothering circle). And as I left her house, I felt the inner weave of our community here. I felt held and supported by the women I have come to call friends.

And as I looked to the internet, I felt supported by your comments, and was lifted by the generosity of blog friends living in our old town who have extended their homes to us as we embark on our long distance ttc journey.

The support and friendship I have on-line, in our old town, and in real life are what are keeping me balanced. When I begin to stress, I am lifted by the hope and generosity of all the people near and far who are playing a role in our journey. I am trying to stay calm and open, and I am letting the love in.

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