Recently it seems as though we are finally reaching some semblance of balance in our not-so-new-anymore role as mothers. E is almost 14 months and somewhere around 13 months A and I started coming out of the cocoon we’d built. The first year is becoming a blur, and when I recall the memories, I don’t know how we got through it. But I we did.

E is becoming such a little kid. He is so opinionated and at times can have a hard time sharing his toys- especially with his cousins. He’s started walking and he using many signs to communicate his wants and needs. He JUST started eating real food last week. He’d been hot and cold with food since we introduced it at 6 months. But he is serious about it now. It’s as if a switch flipped and there is no turning back. He eats everything we eat, and he does it with great enthusiasm. He is also still very serious about breastfeeding…

Our nights are very hard. E is still co-sleeping and nursing all night long. The other night he woke and nursed six times (between 10pm-6am). The very next day I decided it’s time to night wean. Tonight was supposed to be the first night, but by some miracle he only woke to nurse once last night and did not nurse to sleep (but woke a few other times to cuddle). It’s as if he knew, and was following the method I am going to employ. We’ll see how the next week or so goes. It’s time – I am beyond exhausted and now that he’s eating food, he does not need to nurse overnight. I will gladly continue to nurse during the day.

A and I have begun to remember what it’s like to be adults – independent of our child. We’ve gone out with friends, we even stayed out dancing till midnight recently (and I am pretty sure I forgot I had a son at home…it was amazing to feel like “just us” the way it used to be – even if only for a few hours). We’re making summer plans that include a four day camping folk festival adventure. In short: we’re out of the ball and chain baby stage. We’re so excited to spend the summer in the outdoors with E, at the beach, riding bikes on the bike trail (he in the baby bike seat), walks in the state park…the warm weather can not arrive soon enough!

Some days I think we’re nuts for starting the TTC process all over again- right now- but it makes sense in our grand scheme. Midwife appointment is less than two weeks away! I’ve already started acupuncture and am quasi charting this cycle. Next cycle—full on charting. We’ll know more after meeting with the new midwife when we’ll actually start. I’m guessing late spring/early summer. And so it beings…

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