With being pregnant. I know I am lucky that it’s been complication free, and all that stuff… And most days, I can deal with the minor aches and pains and annoyances of being pregnant. And sometimes feeling the baby move, makes up for the times when I feel awful. But right now I just want this baby out.

I pushed myself too much on Sunday. I lifted a couple of heavy things, and I shouldn’t have and now I hurt. Not owning my body is so frustrating. I want to be able to do the things I used to do. Simple things, like taking the air conditioner out of the window and flipping the mattress on our bed (so I helped A move the AC into storage from the living room floor -where we left it last weekend, and helped her flip the mattress…).

I couldn’t get comfortable Sunday evening so I eventually just went upstairs and laid in bed. Times like that it’s hard not to cry. If only to let go of the frustration. Because really crying doesn’t do much else. But I feel so overwhelmingly frustrated that I can not keep my old pace and that I can’t even get comfortable when sitting. Laying down triggered Moon to start with the nightly acrobatics. Once Moon settled down, I fell into a good sleep. But I woke at 11:45 (damn on-call crap). After taking the phone call I was back in bed by 12am, and tossed and turned for two hours before getting up…and now Moon is back at the acrobatics, and I am exhausted, but can not fall to sleep to save my life. I have to get up in fve hours, and I am praying for a snow day so I can sleep in! Why is my body doing this to me?

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