So many lurkers have delurked lately! It’s so cool! Anyone else want to delurk?

Here are some answers to questions posed in the comments of my last post:

Jen asked how we became acquainted with the Parker Martins?

Some time last year Chris, and I connected over Fertility Friend. It must have been in the TTC with Donor Sperm chat circle. I really don’t remember what initially brought us together but we began private messaging through FF. She realized she had gone to school where I live now so we connected about the area and how much we love it. At that time she informed me that she and her partner, Penny, had a vial of sperm left over they were looking to sell (the fact that we were using the same bank made the offer tempting). We had a bunch of sperm in storage at the time so I passed on buying it.

Months later Chris contacted me again to say they needed to get rid of the vial because they were still paying storage and she hated to just see it get destroyed. At the same time we were gearing up for another sperm purchase as we’d used up all ours. I made her an offer for the one vial and intended to also purchase more of the same donor from the bank. There was a catch. Their vial had been moved into storage off site from the bank and even though they lived near the bank at the time, and would have brought it there and had them ship it with the additional vials I’d buy, the bank refused to ship it. Chris spent a lot of energy researching ways to ship the vial across the country to us. But in the end it was going to cost a ridiculous amount of money. So we had to call off our deal (I could have flown to California and paid for an IUI for less than the cost of the shipping of the one vial). By then we’d looked into the donor and were onto at least our fourth donor, and really all we wanted was proof that the next donor could work. Chris and Penny offered us proof with their two babies! So we went ahead and bought a bunch of the same donor. First try with him and I was pregnant. Thanks in part to fertility drugs, I am sure.

Since meeting on Fertility Friend we’ve kept up through our blogs, but more so through email. We’re really excited to have this connection. A and I were the tenth family to conceive with this donor, so by law, we closed him out. I imagine if we registered our pregnancy on the donor sibling registry we’d be able to connect with more families. I’m not sure that we’ve made a decision if we’ll register or not. I guess you could say we created this connection by using the same donor, but hey, whatever works, right?

Shiba asked how we picked our donor and if we ever switched?

I guess what I wrote above gets to most of this but let me fill in what came before the donor that worked. We first started with a sperm bank in New England. It was close to home and made it a little more affordable. We only used one donor from that bank and moved on when it did not work. Picking our donor the first time however, was painstaking. We spent hours reading profiles and talking about the different donors.

Next we moved to a known donor. We tried once with him. It did not work, and our deal feel apart. So we were back to looking at frozen options. We took that opportunity to look into different sperm banks. A was pulled to the Sperm Bank of California because they are the only non-profit sperm bank and they offered a good number of identity release sperm (donor agrees to at least one contact when the child turns 18). We spent some time, although not as much as the first time, reviewing profiles and finally found a donor we both felt good about. Several IUIs later, we needed more sperm…and that’s when we bought the same donor Chris and Penny used. As I said above, I got pregnant the first try with that donor, so we ordered even more of him. We now have five vials on ice for child #2 (there was a time when I wanted three or four kids…and now I can barely imagine being pregnant one more time!). In general, I think switching up sperm can be a really good thing. Some people say only try three times with the same donor, I don’t think I’d try more than six cycles with the same. You just never know what will work.

Observations from today:

  • Bowling while seven months pregnant is not the smartest thing to do. It was fun, but I didn’t realize how careful I would need to be, or how heavy the balls are, or how much your body twists while bowling. But I won.
  • Moon is hiccuping for the first time (that I’ve noticed). Ok, A noticed it when I told her to come feel because the baby was moving a lot. She’s the smmmmmmart one. Wow. hiccups are cool.

Oh…and I am 30, that’s THIRTY weeks today! Holy crap! This baby really is coming soon!

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