Thanks to all my readers who gave me support this week. I am in a much better place than I was when I posted Feeling Blue. I am not over the things that I was feeling, but I did manage to cry some, and A. and I have talked a bit.

We were both working late much of this week and then we finally were getting time together around 8 on Thursday night when I got paged (I was on-call for work) and I ended up spending the next four hours in the ER with a student that soooooooooo did not need to be there. I got home at 6 last night, and my honey had wine waiting for me and we just hung out and eventually talked about all that’s been going on.

Not much has changed, but I am accepting that I need to let go of trying to be in control of getting pregnant. It’s not the end of the World that we need to take this month off. And we believe we will work out our contract so that it suits both our needs and our KD’s needs. It just may take time, but it is good test of our relationship with him and is a meaningful event in building our relationship.

I am enjoying not preparing my body for insemination— I drank coffee yesterday, and black tea today! Tonight A., and I are going out to the most fabulous martini bar with my mother and my favorite co-worker. Just one of their martinis is enough to make me drunk. I am learning how to use my monitor, and not stressing about it working on the first cycle. And best of all A. and I are researching places to take a get-away-weekend for next weekend. We were going to go to our usual retreat and may still, but we are looking at some other options- just to try something new. So far we like this place in Woodstock, NY, and this place near Ithaca, NY, and I’ve been lusting after this place in West Dover, VT for a really looooong time.

Things are more hopeful now. In my professional life I am rejuvenated after attending a conference yesterday. It made me very excited for an upcoming conference I will be attending in Indianapolis next month.

Thanks again to all my virtual friends for you support and kind words during my break down last week. And also, thank you to my very best friend in the whole World, for emailing a comment to me since she couldn’t post a comment on my blog. I love you. We’ve been friends since 5th grade- and she is like a sister to me. She lives in Alaska with her fiance now, which is very cool and she loves it there (and I love visiting her there), but I miss her a lot!

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