In a mater of hours we’ll bid farewell to 2006 and welcome 2007. Our plans for the evening are still very much up in the air, and it seems like we will be spending it with friends from various parts of our lives. The only thing I know for sure, I want to see the fireworks in Noho tonight.

2006 was not a particularly exciting year for us. We did not experience any major life changes (stayed in our jobs, etc). The year did start with the exciting prospect of a kd, accompanied with a this is too good to be true feeling…after lots of emotional negotiation and one insemination cycle, the whole thing fell apart and we realized it had been too good to be true.

We took many months off in order to figure out our next step and to help my body recover from the stress induced anovulatory cycles. After many great ovulatory cycles, we were ready to start again, but had a new plan: frozen, identity release, in office IUI. September arrived, and we were so excited to be trying again. The only thing was, I was nearing the end of a five week stretch where I was working close to 18 hours a day, was pulled in 100 directions, and sure enough it was enough to create an anov cycle. We should have known it would happen like that. I know better than to think my body would not react as it did. But instead, I was so hopeful and then absolutely devastated when the September (and October, because it takes me two cycles to get back to normal) cycle were canceled. I was ready to give up and hand off this TTC project to A. Beside the kd falling through, this was the most difficult TTC episode.

By November, my body was back to normal and we started with IUI. Two cycles later I am still not pregnant. As previously posted, I struggled with this a lot last week. I was in a real rut. Then we started talking about foster parenting, and I gleaned a shimmer of hope. Adoption still feels unattainable, but maybe possible through foster care. And of course just two nights ago there was the offer of a kd. I am cautiously optimistic. He needs to get through all the testing before I can really let myself get fully excited about him.

Provided his tests all come back okay, I don’t think it will take us long to get everything in order and start trying again. We already have a lawyer and a contract, we’d just need to change the name on it, etc. He knows our stance as far as what we want in a kd, and he is very clear that he does not want children, and would not want any kind of visitation, other than our usual getting together. He remembered that one of the big problems with the previous kd was that he wanted biweekly visits (and he lives 3 hours away)! New kd, scoffed at that idea.

It is ironic that at the end of this year, I find we are in the same holding pattern we were in one year ago. Halting the frozen sperm and making plans with a kd. I know that kd plans can fade, just as quickly as they start, and I am prepared for this not to work, but for now, it’s exciting. I hope more than anything that it does work. That we all come to a place where we want to move forward and that a little babe is produced. And I hope that at the close of 2007 I will have a baby to blog about, or at least pregnancy.

Come on lucky 2007!